Zcash: Encrypted Money and "Cypherpunk Principles"—Give Me a Break

Alright, let's get this straight. Zcash, the so-called "privacy coin," is making waves again. Up nearly tenfold? Market share through the roof? Give me a break.

Privacy's "Triumph"? I'm Not Buying It Yet

So, Zcash is supposedly the king of privacy now, flipping Monero. Market share jumped from under 10% to over 45%. Okay, numbers are numbers. But let's be real, are people actually using the shielded transactions, or are they just buying into the hype?

'Cause here's the thing: privacy in crypto is like "organic" at Whole Foods – you pay extra for the idea of something, not necessarily the reality. I mean, 20% of circulating ZEC is held in shielded addresses. That's it? After all these years?

And all these announcements...Maya supporting ZEC, Nym accepting shielded ZEC, Zashi making shielded transfers default. Sure, sounds great on paper. But how many people are really using these features? Are they just checking boxes for the privacy maximalists?

Tyler Winklevoss calls Zcash "one of the most important and underrated crypto projects"? Balaji Srinivasan blathers on about "financial privacy as a human right"? Please. They're trying to pump their bags. It's their job.

The "Tech" That Might Actually Matter

Okay, look, I'll give them some credit. They've been grinding. NU5 brought Halo 2, eliminating trusted setups. That's...actually kind of a big deal. And Unified Addresses, routing funds to the newest shielded pool, is pretty slick. As one CoinDesk analysis puts it, Zcash aims for "Encrypted Money at Planetary Scale".

But Project Tachyon? "Thousands of private transactions per second"? Billions of users? Come on. That's vaporware until I see it. It is just promises, promises.

And they’re talking about coin-weighted “Coinholder” polls. Great, another DAO. Another way for whales to control everything. Color me shocked.

Wrapped Zcash on Ethereum and Binance Smart Chain? So, we're just adding layers of complexity and attack vectors? Genius!

Oh, and the Zashi wallet’s CrossPay feature? Paying with ZEC privately while sending other assets? Sounds like a Rube Goldberg machine. Way too complicated.

So, What's the Real Story?

Look, Zcash might be onto something. The tech is interesting, I'll give them that. But the hype is way ahead of the reality. It is just another crypto project riding the wave of buzzwords and inflated promises. I ain't holding my breath.